


desperate

by juicyjunhui



Series: sinister sensations [2]
Category: VIXX
Genre: Blood, Blood Kink, Blood and Injury, Hallucinations, Hearing Voices, Knifeplay, Lingerie, M/M, Masochism, Mind Games, Ownership
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-13
Packaged: 2019-05-21 19:36:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14921580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juicyjunhui/pseuds/juicyjunhui
Summary: The pain feels good, doesn't it?





	desperate

**Author's Note:**

> fyi I'm trying my best to be a good gore writer I know it's shoddy I get it  
> unbeta'd

It hurts.

He would slice, burn, bruise. But no matter it would never hurt in the same intensity and ecstasy as when Hyuk would hurt him.

Hongbin found himself spiralling - he felt stupidly numb but the red lines brought him back to reality and he would bathe in the feeling.

_Keep going, you look beautiful._

That was all the encouragement it took for Hongbin to continue cutting himself - he went deeper until he swore he could see the bright pink of muscle, watching little orbs of blood bubble to the surface of his skin, he went longer until he could no longer fathom where his mutilation began or ended.

_You're so filthy like this baby, put your white stockings on so I can really see you bleed. You know what to do._

And so, Hongbin grabbed the stockings from his drawer along with a small bag, ignoring the mess his forearms were making on the floor. Neatly, he pulled them up, relishing in how silky they are and how Hyuk would love to feel them and run his large hands up and down his legs, but he could tell he was containing himself.

Opening up the small bag, he grabbed how many he needed. Usually, just four on each leg would suffice, but after his previous act, he dared for more. That, and Hyuk’s silent support and guidance; he knew the more he used the more it would drive Hyuk wild as well as himself, so of course he would use more.

With determined hands, Hongbin pinched the soft flesh just above the lace band of his stocking, before harshly ramming the safety pin in, noticing the resistance of muscle before feeling it slide through due to the crimson lubricant, coming out the other side a matching metallic red, an obvious difference from the silver the pin was before he put it in. Securing the latch once he pulled it through the stocking, Hongbin screamed out a guttural moan.

The second, third, fourth pin went in, each time Hongbin feeling himself fall deeper and deeper, hearing Hyuk’s sweet voice tell him beautiful he was, how he was perfect, how he couldn't wait to absolutely destroy him. He started on the other leg, this time not even bothering to pinch the skin before sliding a pin in, letting the fine needle stab his flesh. He let it sit inside him for a while, dipping his fingertips in the blood that flowed out, pushing the pads on the penetrated flesh and whining at the endorphins it shot through the him.

It felt so fucking good. As he finished his handiwork, he felt Hyuk’s presence beam with pride, whispering sweet nothings, about how he wanted to fuck his pretty slut right there with a knife against his throat because Hongbin just looked so erotically _delicious_.

_The pain feels good, doesn't it?_

If Hongbin was honest, the pain from the pins in his legs and the dull ache of the gashes on his forearms made him bite his lip harder than expected, which he discovered when he tasted hot iron in his mouth. He felt the urge to whimper at the sudden pain he inflicted, but instead he smeared the blood from the small wound on his lips and moaned - he felt himself twitch, all the seething sensations he was feeling was too much, too endearing, he just needed Hyuk to touch him and stop making him tease himself so much.

_You're such a fucking tease, maybe after you've mutilated yourself some more I'll finally give you what you want. Be a good little slut for me._

Humming slightly _,_ letting the vibration tickle his throat, Hongbin closed his eyes before sighing. He knew what he needed to do.

Ogling at the stark contrast of the red against the white stockings, red that seemed to be never ending from the small holes that sat on the skin from his thighs, Hongbin threaded his fingers around the tops of his stockings and letting his hands rest there, anticipating his next move and Hyuk’s approval.

His bleeding arm hadn't slowed, and felt drips of blood fall onto his groin, and that alone almost made him tip over the edge. He must look a sight. He hasn't even touched himself yet, he was waiting for Hyuk to do the honours. It was at this distant thought that made tears prickle his eyes, the sensation making him feel so valid and desired and loved, so good that he just couldn't wait for the next step. The ultimate pleaser. It was time.

The fistful of stockings he had, gone in a flash.

He had just pulled the stockings away from him, watching the pins stretch out and disconnect from his thighs, allowing a low shrill echo the room as he bared his teeth and let the tears rain on his face.

Tunnel vision hit him, all he could see is his now ill fitting stockings, loose around his thighs, and how they're disconnected from the skin unlike they once were, noting the patches of thin milky flesh accented with red that hung off the safety pins.

Hongbin fingered the wounds on his thighs, applying vast amounts of pressure and thrashing in the sheer masochism he was endearing. It was too much. He really was spiralling.

It hurts.

But it just felt too good, too close to the ecstasy only Hyuk could make him feel. Hongbin was so close but he couldn't touch himself, no matter how much he throbbed.

_Look at you, all bloody and disgusting. The lack of skin on your thighs makes me want to absolutely fuck you out. You're mine, aren't you Hongbin? Remember you only belong to me._

He lapped up all the blood he could from the gash on his forearm, thinking about how this was all for Hyuk. He imagined what it would feel like if he was to touch him now, finish reminiscing in the tone of his voice as he called him vile names. Hongbin finally found his release.

He came up his torso, a sharp “yours!” filling the room, allowing him to gulp back the red liquid so it wasn't wasted.

_This is as satisfied as you're going to get, baby._

Hongbin wished that Hyuk would claim him, hold him, cut him up into a thousand pieces and throw him around. Eternally, he was Hyuk’s. Hyuk ran through his veins, his mind, and through his fingertips and finally transfer himself into whatever blade he would hold that day.

It wasn't until he heard Hakyeon moan Hyuk's name in their shared room next door, Hongbin realised no matter what, his true master would never come about and mark him. He would never be owned. The voice inside his head was just there to fuck him up: maybe it was Hakyeon trying to prove a point, that Hyuk was his and Hongbin was merely nothing in the presence of Hyuk's Life.

It hurts.

**Author's Note:**

> please let me know what you think in the comments~ 
> 
> tumblr: @toptaekwoon / @junhuisjuicy [nsfw!]
> 
> twt: @gothictaek 
> 
> i actually really got into writing this holy fuck


End file.
